So far boot camp has met my expectations; it’s grueling, informative and fast-paced. Not to bore anyone further with tech talk, but the course includes two new buzzwords: simlets and testlets. Never heard of them? Me either.

Simlets are interactive applications inside an electronic exam that model a piece of equipment. Through a command line interface, the simlet responds to typed instructions like the actual gear does. Only by issuing the correct instruction set can the tester diagnose and resolve the problem. Holy hands on, baby.

Testlets on the other hand, are several related questions based on a single problem description. In a testlet, questions 28 and 29 can depend the question — and perhaps part of the answer — to number 27. Flub one, blow three. Ouch.

For an added twist, simlets and testlets can be combined, and might even appear in the test as early as question 1. Answering a hybrid simlet/testlet might take twenty minutes out of an available ninety.

At present twenty-percent of exam candidates pass on the first try. I love odds like that.

Monday marks the start of Cisco Boot Camp. The last time I sat in a classroom was for a vendor specific scripting class in mid 2000. About twelve months later demand for that technology waned, shriveled and eventually disappeared. Well, almost. In pockets — small and scattered though they are — it survived, but there is very little call for it in the market now. Certainly anyone hired with that tool kit brings much more to the table.

Note I did not disclose the actual technology. There’s a reason.

First, I don’t want to argue with any of the twenty-seven people still making a living off that product. They drank the Flavor-Aid; they liked the taste; the vendor said — still says — support is never going away. Right on, boss. Keep on dunking the cup back into the barrel. Attendance at training centers tell another story.

At the peak, students filled dozens of training facilities week after week for the classes. Now just two centers in the state offer courses for the product. And when they have takers, it’s once every six months. If that. See also: sunken ship. See also: missing life rafts.

But more importantly, there’s no need to name the product because its story ends the same as all the others. Evenutally the party ends, and it’s hello obsolence. Nothing personal, but that’s the tech cycle; it kills its darlings. Those who last in tech spot waves early, paddle towards — closer, never away from — them, and ride. And as the wave crests, they cast an eye out over the horizon for the next big breaker.

After commencement this morning the entire student body flees the campus. Tonight is the faculty party, complete with lobster and beer. Deep breath…

What began as an irritant turned into a positive. Buying a new computer when the present one refuses to post. Not boot mind you, but post; the motherboard can’t see hardware connected to it. In English: nothing happens after pressing the power button.

With the help of a friend, I’ve nursed big parts of the machine along for some time, replacing busted components as needed. In fact, a substantial portion of the guts are almost six. Wow. That’s like ninety-seven in computer years. Not a complete loss, either. The monitor still runs like a champ, and one of the hard drives works and is possibly salvageable.

I feel like the past week has been a nonstop challenge. Instead of dwelling on the badness, here’s a list of good things that happened:

1) Found out I had more in common than thought with a friend to the north.
2) Tied up all the loose ends at work before heading off to training — no small order.
3) Discovered a new seafood delight. Peel shrimp, whole wheat pasta, olive oil and jack chese. Simple and mmm, tasty.
4) Recovered most of a file lost to my user error, working only from memory. Being that file was the novel outline I spent 18 hours working on, it was a victory in my book.
5) Spent some time with the Wife.

Hopefully this outlook serves as proper tribute to the forces of karmic balance.

The best technical problems are solved by the simplest methods. For instance, my Internet connection stopped functioning sometime on Monday night. This was curious given the history of uptime. While constant outages and connection issues marred the first year of the DSL experience, for the last four years I’ve been connected almost continuously. At one point the modem needed replacement; that ate a few minutes. Otherwise it has been rock solid.

So the no Internet thing bothered me, especially since all configurations have been identical for the last year. And that was the problem: everything was the same. The exact same router has been running for nearly six years; it gave up the ghost on Monday. Which was perplexing, because even on close inspection it appeared operational. Once it quit talking to the modem correctly, the net result was no Internet for me.

Swapped out the old and busted for a new lovely and everything sang. Rack up one in the “buy to fix” column.

To celebrate my return to connected land, I emailed the agent for his thoughts on the novel…