I just can’t quit my accountant.

He reported exceedingly good news last week; I overpaid my taxes in 2009, and thus a modest refund of the overpayment is due. Sometime a treasury check will appear by mail, maybe in the summer; no one is quite sure exactly when.

Regardless of when this payment actually arrives, the development is far better than last year, when I owed a colossal–to me, anyway–amount, because of a designation error on my part. This brings me to me to why I love my accountant, and hate the fact I need him.

Generally, I spend more time filling out the certified mail request at the post office than reviewing and signing tax filings. All year, I stuff everything in a folder and drop it off for my accountant. He mails a nice report with all the filing instructions, completed forms, pre-addressed envelopes and notes on what needs to be done for compliance.

I outsource all the hassle. Because the entire process is a major pain in the butt, and I have better things to do than master the intricacies of the ever changing tax code. For that knowledge and proficiency, his fee is justified.

True, some years go better than others, but in the end, delegating the stress to an accountant preserves what remains of my hair. Perhaps this is why the accountant is almost bald now. He’s worrying for all his clients. And a little bit of that worry is for me. For this I love him.

Yet I hate needing him. And hate more so how I do actually need him.

In 2009, I learned one inextricable lesson about the United States tax code. Don’t quote me on this, because it might have changed by now, but in 2008–and many years previous, according to my accountant–whatever your filing status was on December 31, 2008 was your filing status for the year. Wife gave birth to triplets on December 31, 2008? Yep you got three dependent deductions for the entire tax year.

Well, the divorce finalized in June 2008, and guess who forgot to change the exemptions with his employer? Who forgot to have more money withheld the remainder of the year to compensate for this change of situation? And who neglected to say something to his accountant about this development, when said accountant would have told him what to do?

Yep, the oversight was totally my fault and exactly why I need my accountant. Even if I hate it.

I just can’t quit him.