What is it about people with gobs of money that cheap out on, relative to their wealth at least, plastic surgery that just screams “I like fish chum”? Exhibit A – Micheal Douglas’s recent, ahem…let us say…a face lift gone horribly awry.

If one has the means and accepts the risks of general anesthesia, and the numerous caveats of elective surgery, settling for a doctor from the bargain bin directory seems foolish. Perhaps he’s no longer an A-list maven booking jobs every year, but he’s a notable public figure with a wife frequently in headlines. I’m not sure of his intentions or goals with this procedure, but I know he’s got more money than most in Hollywood and can afford any doctor he likes. Diandra Douglas, his ex-wife, allegedly received 100 million in their divorce settlement nearly a decade ago, and there’s no rumors about Michael shopping at Kmart. On a financial, professional, and some might argue, personal level – he’s a success – an object of envy.

Tis true, I lust for the thick locks he brandishes at age 60. I don’t, however, covet that scar down his cheek courtesy Dr. Frankenstein. When the wounds heal maybe he could go clubbing with Tara Reid.

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