The Ph Conspiracy

Blockbuster launched a unlimited 2 DVD at a time rental for 15 dollars per week upfront, a promotion the Poet and I have pursued aggressively this week. See, unlimited rentals means unlimited and allows for multiple trips per day. If one can stand piling in the car again, and mingling with the snot monsters rubbing their greasy digit all over the display cases, the only constraint is the amount of time required to watch another movie.

Such promotions work for the customer. They work overtime, in fact. At last calculation, 15 bucks divided by the the pile of DVDs rented, brings the cost per title stands to roughly 75 cents. And twenty-four hours left!

There is a drawback with the buffet pricing rental policy, though.  When tasked with renting so many movies, the amount of time spent considering any single one in the store declines–sometimes with disastrous results.

Consider this tragedy:

Tuesday, I plan to see Transformers 2 in the theaters. So I figured I’d refresh my memory by renting the first Transformers movie. And some Megan Fox gawking never hurt anyone.

Cruising through the action section, in the T’s I pick up a copy of a flick with a massive robot emerging from an explosion, titled Transformers. Or so I thought. Damn my naivete.

Only when the movie began playing did the deception unravel. In 2007, the same year Transformers was released, another movie about alien robots attacking Earth hit the market. Note the title.

Swear to God. Trans-f-ing-morphers. If it was watchable, I might have forgiven the duplicity. But no, five minutes in I wanted to claw out my eyes.

Even more horrid news. The director and writer are still alive and plan a Transmorphers 2. Bastards.

2 thoughts on “The Ph Conspiracy

  • July 16, 2009 at 3:23 pm
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    Ah, how quickly you forget “The Green River Killer”

  • July 20, 2009 at 8:53 pm
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    I poked my eyes out. That’s why I forgot. ;)

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