A recent policy change in health insurance forced me into an unpleasant situation: having to pay full market value for a medication. In US prices, it averages 4,400 per anum. Damn. That’s a good smoking habit, or 1/2 a bottle of quality gin every day. And I had to quit both of those.

Fortunately, the Internet delivered me from the madness. That’s right! Canadian and UK pharmacies fill prescriptions from US physicians at a fraction of US street prices. God bless subsidized medicine and open borders.

The reason this entry is filed under humor has to do with the transaction process. Here’s the full chronology, journal-style, from sign up, to receipt.

December 28, 2005
Fill out new patient form online, submit credit card info.

Five minutes later…
Confirmation email comes, with instructions for faxing or emailing scanned copy of the prescription and driver’s license. All seems lovely.

December 30, 2005
Fax copy of prescription and driver’s license to specified fax number. Still lovely.

January 3, 2006
A message from Vancouver, BC on my answering machine. They can not read my name on the prescription. Caller requests callback. A slight wrinkle.

January 4, 2006
Call number, ask for instruction. Told to re-fax prescription by attendant. Due to late hour, wait until morning.

January 5, 2006
Second answering machine message from Vancouver, BC. They have no record of my prescription or patient application. Please re-fax application and scrip. Confusion sets in.

January 6, 2006
Call number again, ask how application disappeared if they couldn’t read the name on the scrip two days prior. Told to re-fax. Get frustrated, look for another pharmacy, and walk away with my blood pressure intact.

January 10, 2006
Credit card bill arrives. Note charge from the site, including shipping on January 4, 2006. Small tremor. Call number again, ask why I was billed for a scrip they have no record of. Told that there are two pharmacies, one in United Kingdom, another in Vancouver. Order shipped via Royal Mail from UK on January 4, 2006. Assured it will appear by January 17,2006. Suggest to pharmacist that maybe both pharmacies need better communication. Assured communication between two pharmacies is excellent.

January 17, 2006
Package from UK arrives, via Royal Mail. Contents are accuracte and in correct amount. Final bill: 1/4 the US price.